I’m Just Not Impressed

Am I supposed to be?

Archive for January 2009

It’s food. Not a hand grenade.*

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I’ve been blogging elsewhere about my desire to lose weight.  At least that’s what it started out as.  Along the way, this blogging, in the best possible way, has forced me to examine in more detail my attitudes about food and size and acceptance.

While I certainly applaud the concept of fat acceptance, I’ve always been more of the “it is okay for other people, but I still need to loose 20 lbs” school of thought.  But one of the things that trying to blog consistently about diet and exercise has helped me realize is that I do feel measurably better – both physically and mentally – if I engage in regular moderate exercise.  I may have exercise specific aches and pains, but I have fewer headaches and less back and knee pain and just feel better than I do when I’m sluggish.  Likewise, I do feel better when I try to make “better choices” in the “have a grapefruit instead of a piece of cheese” vein.   But you know what turns me into a cranky screaming harpy?  Tracking my damn food intake and feeling guilty about eating things that I enjoy.

So, I say no.  I refuse to feel guilty about food.  I refuse to think constantly about what I “can” or “should” eat.  I would rather have to buy whole new wardrobes in sizes 16 and 18 and beyond than to keep beating myself up about the fact that I want to eat dessert or am sick of Lean Cuisines and turkey.  Do I want to eat food that is good for me?  Absolutely.  Should we be having less McDonald’s and pizza at my house?  Absolutely.  But I refuse to feel guilty for liking a cheeseburger better than a grilled chicken sandwich or worse.  I refuse to talk about having a cookie as “being bad.”  I refuse to feign sheepish guilt at getting the damn onion rings.  I refuse to turn away the dessert menu just because I had a fruity cocktail before dinner.

Forget the new year’s resolution to lose weight.  I will eat what I want and I will keep exercising.  If the scale moves or the waist shrinks, great.  If it doesn’t, great too.  

*Title inspired in part by this post by fillyjonk at Shapely Prose.


Written by emandink

January 27, 2009 at 2:21 pm

Things I love the sound of:

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President Barack Hussein Obama.

Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton.

Shivers, I tell you.

Written by emandink

January 22, 2009 at 9:24 am

Watching the World Wake Up From History

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It suddenly occurredto me yesterday that in five days George W. Bush will no longer be President of the United States.  I’ve known that, of course.  All of DC is abuzz with the inauguration.  I’ve been reviewing contracts related to inaugural related events – at least tangentially – for over a month.  Half the local news on NPR is about closings and crowds and the chaos that is feared as the enthusiastic masses amass on Tuesday.

But yesterday, something clicked.  In less than a week, we will have a new President.  That’s pretty damn cool.  It is exciting to see new faces in the news, or old faces in new ways.  Hillary Clinton’s remarks during her Senate confirmation as Secretary of State sent chills down my spine.  Happy, elated, my god, someone who really gets it kind of chills.  I wondered why Obama chose that spot for her.  Now I know.  There have been a lot of moments like that in the past couple of months – moments where I’m struck by how different our government leadership could be.  The DOJappointments especially, make me grin with glee.  Eric Holder, Elena Kagan, a formal NARAL laywer  – all excellent choices.

Sanjay Gupta, maybe not so much.  Warren giving the invocation makes me want to vomit, Robinson notwithstanding.

Eight years ago, like so many others – half this nation – I looked toward January 20th with dread.  This year I don’t.  I find myself looking forward to a State of the Union address for the first time in almost a decade.  But I also look around me and I know this – Obama is not a superhero.  He is not the messiah.  He can, and will, do wrong.

The morning of January 21, the United States of America is not going to be a whole new and different place.  The sun will rise, it will be cold as hell over much of the country and traffic is still going to suck on the Roosevelt Bridge.  The economy will still be in a shambles.  All Americans will still not be equal based solely on the anatomy of the person they love.  My library books will still be due.  But maybe, just maybe, change will still be in the air.

Written by emandink

January 15, 2009 at 11:24 am

What was that about “post-racial” America?

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If you haven’t heard about the 22 year old man who was shot by Bay Area Rapid Transit police as a kick ass start to 2009, I would not be surprised.  I just learned about him today, through a posting in a private forum.

Oscar Grant was unarmed, part of a peaceful permitted demonstration, who according to the linked account, was trying to calm down his companions.

He was then pushed to the ground and shot point blank in the back.

Lest you wonder why duly sworn officers would do such a thing?  Take a look at the picture and tell me if you are surprised.

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January 7, 2009 at 1:57 pm

Posted in Racism

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Once more into the breach.

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Yes, still here.  Just…well, mostly just dealing with the holidays and letting my brain go a little after the election.  Busy both at home and at work doesn’t leave much time for online blathering.

There is stuff in my mental pipeline and tons of things I could rehash about the past couple of months.  But instead, I’ll just say Happy New Year.  Let’s start fresh.

There are days we wish for and days we dream.
All we hold in our hands like pearls.
There are lines that we ponder and lines we scream.
All we hold in our hands like jewels.
There are places we visit and places we live.
All we hold in our hands like gold.
There are dreams that we savor and dreams that we fear.
All we hold in our hands like silver.
All we hold in our hands forever.

Written by emandink

January 6, 2009 at 1:22 pm